In my last post, Baby Girl made progress then endured a setback.
It’s now January 2010.
With the new year came renewed strength and focus. I decided to concentrate only on pee-pee in the daytime. I was determine not to let this potty training thing stress me out and not listen to the stupid voice in my head that said I sucked at this… I felt incompetent that I could not get her to go ‘pee’ in the toilet. It’s silly, I know, but the whole process and her lack of progress were emotional draining.
Mustering up patience, not only for her but myself, I kept encouraging her. Little by little, she started using the potty to go ‘pee-pee'.’
Baby steps and small victories, I told myself.
Then we did what I like to call, ‘test runs,’ going out with underwear only for very short periods of time. This was accomplished when we took Big Brother to school in the mornings. His school is very close to my house so we were not gone for more than 20 minutes. She did well, no accidents. Another small step in the right direction.
Next step was underwear only during daily errands. This was a bit difficult as she did not like public toilets but would only go to the bathrooms at the bookstore and Target. In trying to psychoanalyze her three year old mind, I think she associated those stores with fun. At the bookstore, we went to story time and at Target, we bought stuff. Well, that’s my guess.
About mid -February, the day time pee-pee was going quite well. She was wearing underwear for most of the day. So I decide it was time to focus on the other part of this process.
Little Miss Baby Girl did not liking going ‘poop’' on the potty. She cried when I refused to give her a diaper to poop yet she sat on the potty and big toilet to go pee-pee . She had a few bowel movements on the toilet when I was able to catch her in the act but those were few and far between.
Another battle ensued. This was even more difficult as Baby Girl has issues with chronic constipation. She’s had this issue since she started on solid foods. So what does she do since I'm not giving her a diaper? She starts holding her poop.
Chronic constipation and holding her poop, NOT a good combination. Then for some reason, she starts reverting, not wanting to do either on the potty.
It’s the beginning of March.
We’re having a hellish week. I can’t tell you how many times I was cleaning up pee-pee from the floor. Then one day she removed her underwear, looked me square in the eyes, a defiant look well beyond her years filled her big brown eyes and peed on the floor. Then she said, “Mommy I peed.”
The dog must have sensed the building fury because he bolted. One errant curl dangled down Baby Girl’s forehead. In words she couldn’t quite yet verbalize, her eyes told me, “That’s right mommy, I peed on the floor, watcha gonna do ‘bout it!”
Oh my goodness, people!
Let-me-tell-you, after the initial shock wore off, I calmly walked over to the hallway, checked that the house alarm was on and retreated to my master closet. Yes, I said master closet and yes, I know it’s a little psychotic but I had too. I had to walk away. It wasn’t that she had an accident , it was that she knew exactly what she was doing when she willfully peed on the floor.
My head was spinning. Where was Meredith Vieira with my lifelines? This can’t be normal, can it? Do I need my head examined? Did my precious little angel just do a very witchy thing?
I did not know whether to punish her or just let it go, I was completely stomped. Why can’t kids come with instruction manuals?
I called her pediatrician afterwards. I’d had enough, a call to a carpet cleaning company followed. I then learned an interesting phrase from her doctor called, toilet training resistance. Basically, kids who are over three and are still not toilet trained after a few months of trying. These kids will also delay bowel movements, exactly what Baby Girl has been doing.
Note: please consult your child’s pediatrician if you suspect your toddler is experiencing toilet training resistance as there could be other issues occurring.
Before I could begin practicing any of the tips her doctor gave me, I needed to get her regular again which meant giving her a diaper. I began thinking this issue was purely psychological for her. Perhaps at one time she had a very difficult bowel movement and that has haunted her little mind. Of course, I'm only speculating.
Baby Girl does not sleep with a diaper anymore. Night time training was the quickest transition for her and she’s never had an accident a night.
Thank goodness! I believe the powers that be were looking out for my sanity, lol. She wears underwear in the day and at night to sleep. I still give her a diaper for bowel movements so we’re working on that.
And she starts pre-school in September and has to be fully toilet trained!
I’ll let you know what happens. Feel free to leave any comments or questions in the forum. I would love to hear from you, any hellish potty stories out there?