The old addage about it taking a village to raise a child has certainly withstood the test of time. But it is interesting to me how it has managed to stay afloat even in current times.
Women of today are self-sufficient, independent, and resourceful. We assemble furniture from IKEA by ourselves, fix toilets, earn salaries, and back up our own computers. We own pink screwdrivers, support charitable organizations, and haggle with car salesmen. We cook dinner, but expect that our husband can pull it off as well. We clean toilets, or pay someone to do it, or share the duty with our husbands. We are women, hear us roar, etc...
Then you have a child. Then you are a MOM. You are a MOM and a WOMAN. You do not lose one identity because you have the other. You are strong. Your body just did tremendous work. It made and gave birth to a human. So you think, what's so hard about the rest of life? If I did that, I can do it ALL!
You're right. You CAN.
Just not now. Not for at least 6 weeks, well... more like 6 months.
Really. You can't. I know you think you are different, but you're not. YOU NEED HELP.
That help can be your mom, neighbor, grandma, girlfriend, lady at church, workout buddy at the JCC, it doesn't matter. Use them all. It can be a man. It probably won't be, but it can be. Oh, wait. hubby or partner doesn't count. They are in just as much doo-doo as you, and are also thinking WHAT THE &^$% DID WE JUST DO? What happened to our lives?
You need someone to talk to, tell you to nap, cook you a pan of lasagna, vaccuum your floors, watch the baby while you run to get milk, hell, BRING you the milk/ibuprofen/wine/diapers. These beautiful little creatures drag you into a haze you can not imagine. I'm not referring to postpartum depression, that is a different, albeit common ballgame. This is just the postpartum fog that seeps into your brain, makes you lose track of time, reality, and toothbrushing, and causes you to wonder what happened to the old you. The powerful, self-assured you.
That you, the new mom, you need your village. Any villager will do. Having children did not change with women's lib. It is still the same process that has been going on for hundreds of years. The same physical and emotional culmination of womanhood. And those ancient women knew that they needed help to make it through. Even with the conveniences that we have, you are smart to take and ask for help. You will be a better WOMAN and MOM because of it.